Something Wonderful

For Mother’s Day, a beautiful bouquet of words full of hope and love:

“All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel Mother.”
Abraham Lincoln

“Mama was my greatest teacher, a teacher of compassion, love and fearlessness.
If love is sweet as a flower, then my mother is that sweet flower of love.”
Stevie Wonder

“This heart, my own dear mother, bends, with love’s true instinct, back to thee!”
Thomas Moore

“God could not be everywhere and therefore he made mothers.”

Twilight

Of all the hours of day or night
Give me the twilight hour,
When little birds hide out of sight
And every sylvan bower
Is filled with their sweet good night song,
While darkness creeps apace
O’er all the bright blue sky along
And hides the sun’s gold face.

That is the hour when Mother dear
Says, “Come, sweetheart,” to me,
“And of the earth’s great heroes hear
While sitting on my knee.”
Upon her arm I rest my hand
And wondrous stories hear,
Until it’s time to go to bed,
Tucked in by Mother dear.

—Winifred Sackville Stoner, Jr.

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“Dreaded Middle”

“Everything I’ve written …has seemed to me, at one point or another, something I probably ought to abandon. Even the best things I’ve written have seemed to me at some point to be very unlikely to be worth the effort I had already put into them. But I know I have to push through….For me, it’s more important to keep the discipline of finishing things than to be assured at every moment that it’s worth doing.”
Tobias Wolff, author of This Boy’s Life

“Everything can look like a failure in the middle.”
Rosabeth Moss Kanter

How True! When starting a new writing project, it’s natural to feel hopeful and excited — after all, anything is possible. And When a project is finally completed, we often feel a sense of satisfaction and well, completion. But in between, there’s what Tim Brown, who served as CEO of the creative think tank IDEO calls , “…a negative emotional valley labeled ‘insight.’” This is a very tough place to be, because we often feel that we’ve lost our way and are floundering. 

Many writers and other creatives become so downhearted when they hit this phase of a project, that they give up. But Brown notes that it can be easier to survive and push through this phase if we realize that failure in the middle of a project is a natural, predictable part of the creative process and should be expected 

In her wonderful guide, The Art of Slow Writing, Louise DeSalvo, the author of seventeen books, has an entire chapter called “Failure in the Middle” in which she highlights the authors I’ve quoted here. In it, she also shares her own experience with this stage: “For me, too, the toughest part of the writing process comes in the middle. Middle. Muddle. That’s how it’s always been, although I forget from one book to the next. I start a book, excited. I go to the desk eagerly, write page after page, scene after scene. I don’t yet know what the book is about, but at the beginning, I don’t need to . At this stage, anything goes.”

As Louise describes it, this excitement can sustain her through a draft and even revising. “But then, there’s that moment when we realize that a mass of pages, no matter how good they are, no matter how good they might become, don’t constitute a book. A book is different in kind, not in degree, from a mass of pages. This is the dreaded middle.” Even though we feel like a failure, at this point, adds Louise, “it’s a necessary stage that no creative person can avoid.”

The only way out of the middle — and this is the tough part — is to write through it. So, it you’re in the middle of something and feeling muddled, just keep going! For more help, see my posts, “Fall-apart Stage” and check out Louise DeSalvo’s great guide, The Art of Slow Writing. And then, wherever you are, just sit down — and write on!

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Struggle Strengthens

“If there is no struggle, there is no progress.” Frederick Douglass

“Your dreams always lie outside your comfort zone.” Coach Mike Tully

“A man’s reach should exceed his grasp, or what’s a heaven for?”   Robert Browning

A story worth reminding ourselves of: A butterfly was struggling to break free of its cocoon. Someone watching the slow and painful progress the tiny butterfly was making took pity on it and slit the cocoon so the butterfly could escape more easily. Once it emerged, the little butterfly tried to spread its wings. But it tried in vain — and perished. The human helper later learned with sorrow that it in the act of struggling to free itself from the cocoon a butterfly’s wings are coated with a substance that strengthens them so that once it leaves the cocoon, it can fly. The struggle gives it strength.

“Struggle” is not an easy word to embrace: It suggests resistance, obstacles, impediments. Who wants to struggle, to battle for ground, to fight in order to make progress on the page? And yet, it’s hard to argue with Frederick’s view that there’s no progress without struggle.

With this in mind, can we transform our attitude toward it?

Here’s one approach suggested by my friend and mentor Dr. Rob Gilbert:* When you face a struggle or hit a problem, “don’t get frustrated, get fascinated.” What a novel idea! When we’re fascinated, we’re empowered: we become energized, we become inventive, we come up with ideas. The obstacle we face turns into a challenge, not a roadblock.

So, why not try it? Sometime today, or sometime soon, you are going to be struggling with something on the page: a clumsy paragraph, a creaky plot point, a character who’s wooden instead of alive. When you find yourself caching a challenge on the page, don’t resist the struggle, embrace it. Get fascinated instead of frustrated and impel it to release its strengthening powers to you. Write on!

* Check out Dr. Gilbert’s wonderful Success Hotline: 973.743.4690.

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Roger Rouses

“The man who can drive himself further once the effort gets painful will win.”

“The reason sport is attractive to many of the general public is that it’s filled with reversals. What you think may happen doesn’t happen. A champion is beaten, an unknown becomes a champion.”

“The mile has all the elements of drama.”

Roger Bannister

It’s almost here! Wednesday, May 6, marks a legendary moment in sports and human history. Here’s why: May 6, 1954 is the day that Roger Bannister, a British medical student, ran the the four-minute mile. Just about everyone thought it was impossible do: The medical community warned that a runner’s heart would explode at the pace needed to run a mile in under 4 minutes. Even Roger thought it might be true, but he ran it anyway.

But here’s something even more amazing I’ve learned about Roger, thanks to my friend and mentor Dr. Rob Gilbert’s fabulous Success Hotline (973.743.4690): he only trained 45 minutes a day! That’s right: while his competitors were practicing long hours, Roger put in less than 60 minutes a day. After all, he was a medical student with a full work-and-study schedule; he didn’t have any stray minutes to spare.

But as Rob says, “It’s not how much time you put in, it’s how much you put in the time.” Roger made up in intensity what he lacked in quantity. He’s surely a beacon of inspiration for of us who have limited time to write each day. If Roger could run his way into the history books footfall by footfall, well then, we can write our way in word by word. And as Roger proves, we don’t need tons of time to do it, we just need commitment, focus, intensity, and discipline.

Here are two more fascinating facts in this story. First, right after Roger broke the barrier, other people left and right began running four minutes miles. By proving it was possible, he made it probable.

Second, when Roger ran his way into history, he was rebounding from a huge defeat: He had just recently competed in the Olympics, but failed to medal, though he was England’s great hope. After wiping out in the Olympics, instead of giving up, he set an even bigger goal: becoming the first man in history to run the four-minute mile — and dedicated himself to it. Now that’s persistence! Ultimately, Roger hung up his track shoes and became a world-class neurologist. He was also knighted, not once, but twice. What a story — write on!

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Relaxed Creativity

Albert Einstein is believed to have invented the theory of relativity while riding his bicycle. Evidence is mounting that taking breaks from mental activity boosts productivity and creativity. The reverse is also true: Skipping breaks can create fatigue and stress. 

Mental concentration is similar to a muscle—after sustained use, it needs a rest to refresh and recover, much as a weight lifter needs rest in-between round of reps. 

“Short and frequent intervals of study” — that’s the advice one of my high-school teachers gave us about studying. It turns out, she was right. Working intensely for short periods of 25 minutes or even 15 minutes punctuated by brief breaks can be more productive than sitting long hours at a desk. Breaks also encourage flashes of inspiration.

Here are a few easy brain-boosting break ideas to work into your day:

Listen to a guided meditation for 10 or 15 minutes. There are tapes and CDs that promote relaxation and mental refreshment — and reduce muscle tension. Just put on a pair of headsets and you’re off.

Close your eyes and take 10 deep breaths. Walk away from your desk. Find a quiet place, where you can sit, close your eyes, smile to yourself and take a few deep breaths. Imagine tension, stress and anxiety leaving your body as you breathe out, and peacefulness, positivity and relaxation filling your mind with every breath.

Eat an apple. In the middle of a busy day, when you feel rushed, take a few minutes to eat an apple (or another favorite fruit). Just do it very slowly. Notice the flavor, the texture, the freshness. After a few minutes you’ll feel much calmer and less stressed.

Energize yourself with H2O. Drink a full glass of water, then splash some water on your face: warm to relax or cold to wake up and make yourself more alert.

Do something artistic. Write a short, funny poem. Draw a picture or doodle. Take a few photos of your surroundings. Let your creative side shine!

Get moving: Leave your cell phone behind and head outside for a brisk walk to refresh yourself. Try interval walking—raising your heartbeat and letting both your mind and body relax and recharge.

A relaxed mind is a creative mind: Just remember this and write on!

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Something Wonderful

Don’t say, don’t say there is no water
to solace the dryness at our hearts.
I have seen

the fountain springing out of the rock wall
and you drinking there. And I too
before your eyes

found footholds and climbed
to drink the cool water.

The woman of that place, shading her eyes,
frowned as she watched—but not because
she grudged the water,

only because she was waiting
to see we drank our fill and were
refreshed.

Don’t say, don’t say there is no water.
That fountain is there among its scalloped
green and gray stones,

it is still there and always there
with its quiet song and strange power
to spring in us,
up and out through the rock.

~ Denise Levertov, “The Fountain” in THE JACOB’S LADDER

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Journaling Joy

“The art of writing is the art of discovering what you believe.”
Gustave Flaubert

A wise friend and mentor once shared an interesting experience: She decided to go through some of her old journals and pull out any snippets of insight or reflections that she felt might be helpful to her in her current life. In revisiting these journals, she was surprised and happy to see how she had worked through some key questions at an earlier point in her life and how certain concerns seemed to come up for her again and again. Having captured her concerns and trains of thought on paper gave her a very fulfilling sense of how far she had come in sorting out some major issues in her life.

Inspired by her, I’ve been jotting down thoughts in journals myself for over a year and it’s been very inspiring!

Many writers I admire kept journals. Virginia Woolf, If I recall correctly, kept running journals that paralleled her novel writing. She would often puzzle out themes or jot down character sketches in her journals — and many of her spontaneous musings and ideas eventually found their way into her fiction. I know that John Steinbeck also kept journals that chronicled the evolution his fictional creations. 

Along with the creative support that journaling offers us as writers, there’s also growing evidence of its health benefits and therapeutic value. Studies show that when you’re feeling frustrated or upset, simply jotting down a few positive personal qualities you like about yourself — that you’re a loyal friend or a great listener, for example — can help defuse your stress. In fact, people who made a point of doing this for two weeks reported feeling more upbeat and less irritated by daily events in their lives. Why? thinking about and jotting down what makes you special can spark self-confidence and positive emotions. 

Regularly writing down thoughts and feelings has also been shown in studies to improve memory, lower blood pressure, and strengthen the immune system. All of which just reinforces what we writers already know: Words matter. And when we write them down, their meaning often becomes clearer. 

So, if you’ve hit a thorny patch in a novel plot or you have just the glimmer of an idea for an essay, why not crack open a shiny new journal, jot down your ideas, and see where they take you? You might find that journaling juices up your prose. Write on!

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Start Strong

« A friend of mine once told me that a professor of hers said that if she wanted to quickly get the lay of the land in a new and unfamiliar area of study, she should head to her local children’s library. Why? Mainly because well-crafted children’s nonfiction books distill complex topics into their basic components. They cut the wheat from the chaff and get to the heart of the matter, often both economically and elegantly.

It turns out that kids’ books also have something to teach us about how to write an opening line that grabs readers and pulls them into a story. Opening lines are tough to write (tell me about it!), but they pack a lot of punch: They’re a key factor in a reader’s 30-second decision to buy a book. That’s right, unbelievable as it seems, you often have just half a minute to persuade a potential reader to commit to buying your story. 

Two tidbits of advice from Richard Peck, a veteran children’s writer, might be worth considering even if you’re writing an adult novel or short story: 1) If you’ve got an attention grabber — be sure to use it in the first line of your first chapter. 2) Make sure that action of your story has already begun before the opening line. 

Just to prime your creative pumps, here are the openings of a few popular juvenile-targeted novels, some of which have crossover appeal:

“The Friday before winter break, my mom packed me an overnight bag and a few deadly weapons and took me to a new boarding school.” The Titan’s Curse by Rick Riordan

“There was a hand in the darkness and it held a knife.” The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman

“When Mr. Bilbo Baggins of Bag End announced that he would shortly be celebrating his eleventy-first birthday with a party of special magnificence, there was much talk and excitement in Hobbiton.” Fellowship of the Ring by J.R.R. Tolkein

“I remember lying in the snow, a small red spot of warm going cold, surrounded by wolves.” Shiver by Maggie Stiefvater

“Life was good before I met the monster.” Crank by Ellen Hopkins

“They took me in my nightgown.” Between Shades of Grey by Ruta Sepetys

Something to think about: Would you read on after these first lines? Write on!

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Flying High

“To fly, we have to have resistance.”
Maya Lin

“Now I know we had no money
But I was rich as I could be
In my coat of many colors
My mama made for me.”
“Coat of Many Colors” by Dolly Parton

Hearing how one creative artist is motivated by another always gives me a boost—we all need to dip into someone else’s creative well now and then for a shot of energy and creativity. That’s why I loved reading about how a sitcoms actress became a huge Dolly Parton fan. Growing up in Texas, she listened to Dolly on the radio and came to admire her gifts as a singer-songwriter, especially her song about her “struggles coming up hard, “Coat of Many Colors.” 

“Coat” tells the story of how Dolly’s mother sewed together colorful rags to make her a winter coat and told her daughter not to be ashamed of wearing it because being poor was just a state of mind. 

Though the sitcoms actress “never wanted for anything,” her family also struggled and hearing Dolly’s song gave her heart. As she recalled, “Dolly’s courage on ‘Coat’ also helped me become an actress. The words took my focus off the superficial stuff and the discomfort of starting out and let me focus on what I needed to do to be good enough. Despite Dolly’s background, she was able to find her self-worth, work hard, and become special.”

What a tribute to the power of words! We never know how the songs or stories we write will find their way into someone else’s heart and show them a rainbow path they might not have seen or followed without us. Through our words, we can give each other wings. So let’s soar together today. Let’s fly high as we all write on! 

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Faithful Scribes

“Faith is always an adventure.” Elsie Chamberlain

“Faith is the centerpiece of a connected life. It allows us to live by the grace of invisible strands. It is a belief in a wisdom superior to our own. Faith becomes a teacher in the absence of fact.” Terry Tempest Williams 

Faith: it’s an uncharted territory when it comes to our writing. But consider for a moment some of the many ways it’s defined in my trusty Merriam Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary: 1) allegiance to duty or a person: loyalty; 2) fidelity to one’s promises; 3) sincerity of intentions; 4) firm belief in something for which there is no proof. 

Pondering these many meanings of faith, I’m struck by how important it is for us to have faith in our work and the sincerity of our intentions in pursuing that work. Every day, as we turn to the page, we encounter obstacles, internal and external, that can make us question the value of what we write and our faith in our ability to say what we want to say. 

We may find that our mind is sluggish, our energy is low, and that our spirits are flagging — any or all of these can shake our faith in our ability to go on. we may find ourselves coping with rejection or confusing feedback that seems to muddy the waters instead of giving us clarity. Or like me, some of us may be struggling with a rough revision that seems to be falling apart instead of coming together.

Any one of these obstacles can test our faith in what we’re trying to accomplish on the page. And if a few of them hit us all at once — well, that can be really tough. And since there’s no solid assurance — no proof — that any of our efforts will actually bear fruit, what is there to fall back on? What can we really rely on? 

Here’s the answer I’ve come up with: Faith in our ability to be faithful to our work. What does being faithful mean? It means being Loyal, constant, staunch, steadfast, resolute. 

So the next time we hit a road bump — and there’s surely one ahead — let’s hold fast to the sincere intentions we set for ourselves when we first started whatever project we’re working on. Let’s be faithful to those intentions. Let’s be faithful scribes—and write on.

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